Talking about chemistry, people naturally think about physical attraction. Talking about physical attraction, people naturally think about appearance.
‘It won’t work if there is no chemistry’ is what most single people would say. With this logic, most people believe good-looking men and women shouldn’t have trouble dating. Sometimes pretty people think these themselves, too.
I have to say good-looking does help. A pretty person has much more attention in a shop or other public places, not just in the relationship. People often treat them with extra warmth.
However, is good-looking so essential in a relationship? Would pretty people be more accessible to date? How about ordinary-looking people? Do they have trouble finding good partners?
Let’s take a look at our society. Many good-looking men and women struggle to find the right person, while many ordinary-looking people walk along the street with their gorgeous partners.
I always remember two people. One was a beautiful woman. Not only pretty, but she was also highly feminine. 90% of men loved to meet her after seeing her photo. Some men even said, “(she) is too good to be true. “. But after ten years, countless dates, she is still single. The other one was a young guy. He was short, ordinary-looking. But ever since he started dating, he was never short of girlfriends. Most of his girlfriends were pretty. Finally, he is getting married to a lovely young lady who has a pretty face and a beautiful personality.
The stories of these two people remind us of the truth: Looks are not everything. A person’s appearance is only a door, which only takes 5 minutes to enter. But what attract people more is what they can find after entering the door, including personality, intelligence, interests, life experience, and most of all, self-esteem. A friend used to say: finding the right person is more inside job than outside. These qualities keep them to stay longer than 5 minutes, or even longer than years. Whoever can display one or two or three of good grades, he/she is beautiful, even physically he/she is not so good-looking. Or whoever fails to deliver good quality, his/her beauty doesn’t shine.
So the challenge for single people is not the appearance, but their inner quality, which takes time and effort to build up. For instance, if someone has a reserved personality, which makes it hard for other people to approach them, he/she should build up more sense of humor and a smile on the face. It will immediately make her/him attractive. Or if someone’s life is a bit boring, not much to communicate with, he/she should develop more interest, expend reading, or become more curious.
Confidence is always the most important thing when you meet people. In my previous story, the short guy is not handsome. But he had confidence some good-looking men don’t. He never thought being scrubby is a problem. Because being confident, he was witty, too. He could make people laugh. Pretty ladies felt secure in front of him.
Building confidence takes time, but it is not difficult. Attitude can help. With a positive attitude, people can handle rejection easily. Handling rejection positively, people can move on quickly. Moving on quickly, people suffer less hurt. Suffering less hurt, people will have more confidence in themselves. You know what? The more confidence you have, the more people will like you. The value of faith is 100 times more than the value of a good appearance.